John Mayer Uses Fifty Shades Of Grey To Pick Up Women

In case you're new here, you might not know that John Mayer is a total, complete douchebag. He's the type of guy who will take you out, tell you that you're hot and then subsequently tell you that you shouldn't speak. He's also the type of guy who will have sex with a woman and then tell the media that she's "sexual napalm". (Jessica Simpson, anyone?) Suffice it to say, he's a douche. Now that he looks like a homeless douche, he has revealed his new tactic in getting women in the sack.

Instead of singing Your Body Is A Wonderland to women, he has taken to singing the lines from Fifty Shades Of Grey. That ought to work out well. Can you imagine hearing John Mayer singing about the "Red Room Of Pain"?!?

When talking with Jimmy Fallon, John said, "I was trying to impress her, and she had the book on her Kindle. And so I said, 'I'm going to sing it to you.' So I sang her one of the pages of Fifty Shades Of Grey."

When asked how she reacted, John said, "She fell. She fell to the ground laughing and I think that was the only way I could make her laugh. I sold out, completely."

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